Is Mental Wellness Regarded as Unimportant?

Yesterday, I did a project management workshop for a local secondary school (of a rather high caliber). The purpose of this was to get the students into groups to promote a lifestyle to their fellow schoolmates.

They were given choices of topics ranging from increasing exercise time to smoking prevention. As there were more groups than topics, many groups worked on the same topic but managed to produce diverse ideas without consulting each other - evidence of the power of many minds.

What stood out to me was that none of the groups chose to promote mental wellness.

I originally attributed this to a possible lack of knowledge on the subject or that the topic was too broad. However, as I started to think about it, I wondered if it was simply regarded as unimportant compared to a healthy physical lifestyle, good eating habits and abstinence from tobacco and alcohol.

Perhaps this occurred due to a non-emphasis on mental health, that stress, anxiety and depression are seen as normal in our society.

There is no doubt that we are always told to 'Chin up!' and get on with what we are supposed to do, to fake confidence in the face of uncertainty and even to hide mental disorders or risk being stigmatised by others as 'crazy' or 'insane'.

Is this really the way we want the next generation to grow up believing? That nobody wants to hear about their problems and that they need to handle their issues on their own? Is this why we are becoming so cold and uncaring?

Thoughts to ponder upon...

A Commemorative Dinner, A Book Launch, An Opportunity to Collaborate

On Wednesday, I attended an event at SAFRA Toa Payoh - 'Lest We Forget' - a dinner to commemorate the passing of our Senior Minister Mr. Lee Kuan Yew and to work towards continuing his legacy of nation-building and raising up future leaders.

The event was organised by the SG100 Foundation (yes, the same one that organised the SG100 Carnival in January this year) and it was a huge affair - 500 people across many industries, of various expertise and with myriad life experiences.

I met familiar faces and connected with some whom I only knew by name. I also got to meet new people and I look forward to working with them on future projects and collaborations.

The event was also a book launch of B.O.L.D: Be Outstanding Living Your Dreams. This is a book containing interviews of 10 inspiring individuals who have impacted and changed lives, in which they share their experiences and offer nuggets of wisdom to the future generations.

I was particularly interested in the interview with Fandi (Ahmad), for whom I did the photoshoot in February. It's always a pleasure to know that your work is good enough to be published and immortalised in a book.

The book will be available in bookstores very soon!

Spot a Social Faux Pas? Just Speak Up!

A few days ago, I was on the right side of the upper deck of a bus and reading a book when someone a few seats away on the left side of the bus suddenly decided to watch a video at close-to-maximum volume on his mobile phone.

The bus wasn't very crowded but there was a middle-aged man, also on the left side, a few seats in front of the video-watcher, who turned to glare his disapproval. Without saying a word, of course.

My initial instinct was to just ignore the situation, but the video started to produce high-pitched sounds, made worse by the tiny speakers.

It was too much to bear, so I looked up from my book and said to the video-watcher, "Hi. Could you turn the volume down, please?" in (what I assume) was a neutral tone, though I'm pretty sure some annoyance went through. I wasn't exactly smiling.

The video-watcher fumbled a little with the phone but brought the volume much lower, to which I said, "Thank you."

The rest of the bus journey went on rather smoothly, though I did catch myself wondering how unpleasant it would have been if I had just kept quiet.

We have a slightly odd culture here of staying silent when things need to be said. Most Singaporeans will simply stare at the social offender, hoping that he/she will realise the social faux pas he/she is committing and 'automatically' rectifying it. 

I'm sure we've all witnessed this every now and then and it would be great if social offenders realise on their own what they are doing.

Unfortunately, it's far more likely that they are thinking more along the lines of, "If no one is telling me to stop, then I don't have to stop," or "If someone is bothered by what I'm doing, they'll speak up."

Perhaps they don't even realise that what they are doing is annoying other people. Some people are really, really lousy at reading facial cues and body language.

The only way they will know is if somebody tells them.

Of course, most of us would say that it's none of our business or that we would rather be nice and suffer in silence.

I've come to a realisation that we have to speak up, not just to allay the annoyance, but also to educate these people that what they are doing is not alright.

There are 3 things that I think will help:

1) A polite request for a specific change in behaviour

"Could you lower the volume, please?" is likely going to work a lot better than "Shut that phone up!"

2) Rehearse in your head before you speak

This is so you will hear yourself saying it first. Listen for unnecessary angry words or sarcasm and remove them. You want to effect a change, not start a fight.

3) Make normal eye contact

Glaring and staring are rude in and of themselves. Look at the person in the same way that you would someone with whom you were going to have a conversation.

The next step?

Just Speak Up!

The Use of a Diploma in TESOL

In late 2014, I finally received my Diploma in Teaching English to Speakers of Other Languages (TESOL). Originally, I took the diploma course in response to a potential long-term collaboration with an Australian institution intending to set up course facilities in Singapore.

Though there was much done to advance the project, it, unfortunately, didn't come to pass as intended.

As a result, I didn't get much use out of my diploma. Sure, certain modules were undoubtedly helpful in my general teaching and training, but I started to wonder if I would ever get to make use of it.

I got my answer yesterday.

Through speaking with an individual in charge of training centers in Cambodia and Thailand, I learned that they are seeking teachers with my qualifications.

Of course, I've always known that such a demand exists but many of these training centers specifically ask for 'westerners' as their teachers - a point that never made sense to me. Wouldn't an Asian have a better grasp of cultural norms in Asia and thus be better able to make English lessons more relevant and relate-able to his/her learners?

What particularly struck me during my conversation with this individual in charge of the training centers is that they are actively looking for Asians instead of the usual 'westerners'. Their thoughts on the matter are similar to mine - that Asians will be easier to relate to and will be better able to appreciate and respect the local culture.

Well, that's a truly refreshing change! It re-ignited my interest in teaching English in the SEA region, something that I've been wanting to do since I got my diploma.

It appears that doors of opportunity have now been opened!

Image from Wikipedia